Monday, February 6, 2012

Things that Shouldn't Surprise Me...but Do!

You would think by now, 5 kids later, I would not be surprised when my small kids, 2 and 3 year olds in particular, do some really annoying...I mean really "typical" behaviors.  
Here are a few things that shouldn't surprise me but do.  
  • Repeated statements like..."No! I do it myself! Bad choice Mommy! Mom. Mom. Mom. Mom. I don't like it!"
  • Food will be tossed all over the table, her clothes, my clothes, the floor, and onto the dog in a fit of rage right after having cleaned the floor or put on a fresh outfit.
  • Toilet water fascinates and MUST BE PLAYED IN whenever possible.
  • Freshly washed and styled hair, must be touched with dirty hands covered with something like yogurt or even worse...glitter or glue.
  • Diapers soiled by a toddler, are disgusting and the smell could be used as nerve gas.  Take note, military.
  • The thought of nap time coming to an end is devastating and can depress any mother.
  • Everything takes so much longer since your toddler has discovered his/her new found independence.
  • Loaded diapers or emergency trips to the potty will occur only when you are already running very late.
  • Clothes will be stripped off and LOST, followed by dress-up clothes being put on, 5 minutes before needing to leave for an appointment to get to the bus stop.
  • When trying to use the bathroom alone, a child will hurt themselves, bite, hit, and scream...or the phone or doorbell will ring.
  • You can decipher cries as if they were Morris code...I'm hurt. vs. She hit me. vs. I'm tired. vs. I am a big-fat-faker cry (my personal favorite).  You know what I am talking about.
  • Tattling.  Enough said.
  • What you do or say when you think no one is noticing is quite embarrassing when a 2 year old repeats it or talks about it in public. ( i.e."I want Angry Birds!"  or "Just go, dude!" or "You tooted.  You smell bad.")
  • Once settled down for nap, your usually constipated child blows out her diaper ending nap for not only herself, but also for her sister who heard the cries and probably smelled the stench.
  • And a popular one..."MINE!!!"
Come on guys.  I know that you have a few of your own. 

Good thing they are so darn cute.


    Kara @ June & Bear said...

    our children really are a good barometer for what we say aren't they? and we've just entered the tattling stage--eegads.

    Krista said...

    Kara, ain't that the truth. My littlest ones have older siblings to learn wonderful things like tattling from. Hold onto this for as long as you can, my friend. For future reference, we say, "If it isn't a big deal, don't squeal."

    Tricia said...

    You got many I thought of!